“There will be 3 to 5 inches of snow today, and a snow emergency has been declared,” the weather report said “You must park your cars on the odd numbered side of the streets.” Joe said, “Jeez, okay,” and got up from his coffee. The next day they were sitting down with their morning cups … Read more
The devil decides to pay them a visit, so he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they’re happy. They tell him, “Well, we’re so sick of the cold where we’re from, and this place is nice and toasty.” The devil, annoyed, storms away and goes to … Read more
The local animal shelter knows he has a dog and they think that this could be their way into his wallet. They go to his door and he answers, “What do you want?” One of the ladies replies, “Hello Mr Smith. We know you are very wealthy and we know you also never give to … Read more
Two elderly nuns, Sister Dulce and Sister Andrea are on their way back from the market one evening. It’s already very late, and they have quite a distance left before reaching their convent. Suddenly, Sister Dulce grabs hold of Sister Andrea’s arm “Is it just me,” she asks, “or is that man following us?!” Sister … Read more
He saw an ad in the newspaper about a sales position He didn’t know the first thing about sales, but figured he could learn, and so he contacted the company. “It’s simple,” said the hiring manager “You go door-to-door selling toothbrushes Everyone needs a toothbrush, you should be able to sell lots of them.” The … Read more
Son: No, I don’t wanna go to school today! Mom: But you have to go to school. Son: But, I don’t wanna go to school. Mom: Give me three good reasons why you should stay home, and I will give you three reasons why you need to go to school. Son: Well, all the students … Read more
The Us / Mexico Border Guard Is Shocked When Juan Said This with two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, “What’s in the bags?” “Sand,” answered Juan. The guard says, “We’ll just see about that. Get off the bike.” The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties … Read more
A rich millionaire decides to throw a massive party for his 50th birthday. So during this party he grabs the microphone and he announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion he has a swimming pool with two crocodiles in it. “I will give anything they desire of mine, to the … Read more
When the trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver said he was a Magician and Juggler and was on his way to Atlanta to do a show for the Children’s Hospital. He didn’t want to be late. The trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling and said if the driver … Read more
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, ‘I’ll give each of you just one wish.’ ‘Me first! Me first!’ says the admin clerk. ‘I want to be in the Bahamas , … Read more