Get ready to laugh out loud with our hilarious jokes webpage! Discover a treasure trove of witty one-liners, clever puns, and side-splitting anecdotes that will keep you entertained for hours. From silly jokes to clever wordplay, our collection caters to all senses of humor
A brain and a pair of jumpleads walks into a bar. The brain orders two pints from the barman but the barman refuses to serve him. When asked why, the barman replies ” Well you’re clearly out of your head, and your friend there looks as if he’s about to start something”
A guy goes to the Doctors and he says “Doctor, I’m really worried about my brother, he thinks he’s a Hen ” The Doctor says “well have you taken him to see a psychiatrist?”, and the guy says “Don’t be stupid, we need the eggs “
A man goes to the vet about his dog’s fleas. The vet says “I’m sorry, I’ll have to put this dog down”. The man is incredulous and asks why, and the vet says “because he is far too heavy.”
A polar bear walks into a bar and the barman says, “what would you like to drink?”. The polar bear hangs his head and sighs deeply and then sayss “I’ll have a pint of bitter barman”. The barman looks at the bear and says “why the big paws?”
Three vampires are sitting at a bar. Bartender asks the first one what he wants. “I think I’ll have a glass of blood.” “Okay, what’ll you have?” he asks the second vampire. “That sounds good. I’ll have a glass of blood too.” “And what can I get for you?” he asks the third vampire. “I’ll … Read more
Q: Did you hear about the Ice Cream Sales man that was found dead in his store covered in chocolate sauce and syrup? A: Police think he topped himself
A man goes into the doctor with a penguin on his head. The doctor says “What can I do for you?” and the penguin says “well doc, it started as this growth on my foot…”
A penguin walks into a store and asks the teller, “Do you have any grapes?” “No.” He replies. This same thing happens the next day. On the third day the teller replies,” No, and if you come in asking for grapes again I will nail your flippers to the floor ” On the next the … Read more
A grad student, a postZdoc, and a professor are walking through a city park and they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, “I usually only grant three wishes, so I’ll give each of you just one.” “Me first Me first … Read more
Patient : “Doctor I keep hearing “The green, green grass of home” in my head. Doctor : “That’s called the Tom Jones Syndrome” Patient : “Is it common ?” Doctor : “It’s not unusual